If you let me I could, I'd show you how to build your fences
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Wednesday, January 15, 2014, 2:25 AM
Tsunami
i actually had a weird dream 3 nights ago. i was in the beach with my family then we suddenly felt like a tsunami was coming. we hurriedly ran to the elevated parts of that place we were in and due to the massive panic happening, i lost track of my mama, papa and bro. i was only able to see them climbing up the stairs amidst the sea of people who was also rushing their way up to the stairs to save themselves. and then a scene happened. somebody murdered someone in the crowd but i do not get why. after that, me and my family survived the tsunami and as far as i can remember, only my mom, dad and bro got reunited. i was looking at them from afar and i do not understand why i did not come up to them. i just looked at them..
just this morning, i received a news that papa will probably not be here for graduation. upon hearing the news, i really felt like crying and i did not know how to react. i uttered words out of dismay and out of being desperate and in denial of the thought. i just cannot accept the fact that the person who is the reason behind all the efforts i am putting in all through this and my ambitions of having medals in graduation will not be here during that day. i actually will not mind not having a feast for that occasion or any material gift.. his presence would be the best gift ever and i also would not mind starving for the next months. but i think mama has a point.. i was being selfish. i forgot that i have a younger brother who needs things. a mother. i just thought of the sacrifices i can do and did not mind that they will not be able to give up the things i am willing to give up just to make papa go home.
that's when i realized the meaning of that tsunami in my dream.
it was a premonition of a huge wave that was about to hit my life -- the pain of the possibility of not having papa with us during one of the most important days of my life.
screw being poor. if i was just rich, if we were all rich, families of OFWs will never have to suffer like this. people think we earn a lot but in reality, we only earn enough for us to get by the day to day combat of life. if only the Philippine government system was just good enough in giving good jobs to everyone, no daughter will feel the way i feel right now. i know i am not the only one with a situation like this.
with a plight like this, i know there are also other daughters who are in despair since one or both of their parents can not make it with them on their special days.
i promise i will get rich someday.
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Vanity isn't a sin, a little narcissm wouldn't hurt.
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